Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
they're like a gay fantastic four
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
