I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize