I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
