i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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