He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize