I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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