And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize