Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Randomize
