Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
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