he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
if only i could text you this smell
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize