"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
