Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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