no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize