He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize
