i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
