Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Randomize
