I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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