ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize