I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
