we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
