i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
