Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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