took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
