Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
