Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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