Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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