so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
