This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
