I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
