we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
