I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
