Pregnant stripper...not hot.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize