I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
