her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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