im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
