Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
