things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
