My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
