He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
