Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
