What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize