I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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