Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I need to calm my uterus...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize