Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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