BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
