have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
