I must be too annoying 4 u.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
