Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
