Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
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