Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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